How did I get so into the Mayonnaise that I would actually consider writing and dedicating a web page about it? I'm not really sure... I think it all started when I was eating some left over ordeuvres that my mother brought home from a business meeting she had attended that day. One of the better things on the platter was the most basic. It was french bread, thinly sliced, and topped with near paper thin slices of tomato (a fruit which in the future I plan to make a page for and link to this one). I kept eating the tomato and french bread ordeuvres without knowing why they were so good. After twenty of thirty I noticed that there was something coating the bread. At first I figured it was just butter. It certainly was not margerine, since margerine can never, ever, taste as good as butter, but that's for another page, and another time. But after a few more I started to wonder whether even butter, with all it's magical properties could taste this good. So I asked my mother why she thought these particular ordeuvres tasted so good. Then came the responce that changed my life... "why Ryan, it's just a little Mayonnaise."
"Wow," I thought to myself. This stuff is quite simply amazing. I needed more information. "Mom, why don't my sandwiches taste this good? You claim to put Mayonnaise on them all the time."
"That's because I use Miracle Whip Ryan."
Then came a low point in my life. A moment of stupidity I'd rather not admit to. The kind of thing that people just don't tell strangers. But after a few visits to the psychiatrist, I'm ready to admit that I at one time said, "But mom, I thought Miracle Whip was Mayonnaise."
As I think back on that moment, the feeling I get is like seeing a child play with needles, or eating at a restaurant and having a bug crawl out of your food; Utterly disturbing. But life goes on...
Sure I had tried real Mayonnaise before, possible hundreds or thousands of times, but it was then that I had my first taste of "the Mayonnaise" as I know it now. The rest, as they say is history.
That's right, this is a new section!!! Yay, finally more Mayo-madness!
Read a little bit about the question that plagues us all on this very special, and dedicated page!
At this point the site is nothing more much than an idea. A personal page that I'd like to see grow with time into "The Mayo Center". I'd like to ask anyone who'd like to be involved with this silly page in any capacity to email by clicking below:
below.
Also, if you like funny... try my good buddy Miller's homepage.
And now a frivolous form: